I often have to remind myself that Beyoncé is a regular human like me. She has arms and legs, fingers and toes, fears and worries, anxiety and peace, grief and joy — just like the rest of us. The genius of her work is proof that she is in a league all her own, not because she is some beyond-human species that is above the rest of us, but because she put herself there.

I always feel as though I am in the middle of a game of tug-of-war. Each of my arms is one side of the rope and my body plays the role of the middle. The pressure of consistency and my mixed feelings about the desire for success pull one side of me, and my humanity and limited capacity pull the other.

Our society’s desperation to keep whiteness and white people in power has not come without a grave cost to everyone who inhabits this society. That means you. And that means me. It is because of white supremacy that we have built a society that refuses more help to its citizens than any other developed nation in this world. It is because of white supremacy that we have withheld the human rights to safety, security, education, health care, public resources, child care, and more. It is white supremacy that wrote the very American narrative that even your most basic human rights must be deserved and earned.

This obsession with production and perfection seeps into every facet of our lives — from our education to our careers to our parenting. It is inescapable. If you are not incessantly trying to outperform your counterparts and yourself every day, society will shout at you from every angle about how much of a failure you are. Sitting down is out of the question. Rest is for the lazy and weak. There is always more to do, more to be, and more to chase. You are never enough in our society, and society reminds us of that every single day.

Now, I’m not saying that having goals, aspirations, and even a to-do list is destroying your self-worth and that we must get rid of it all. That would be ridiculous and a little extreme. I live by a good to-do list, otherwise, I would not remember whether I’m coming or going on a daily basis. The problem lies with our culture. Its historic roots in white supremacy created our modern-day human hierarchical culture that measures your worth based on your race, gender identity, class, ability, and participation in capitalism. This culture takes one look at your humanity and demonizes you for it.

It is not a coincidence that we are a society of humans walking around in a worthiness-chasing daze. Our society has destroyed our self-worth, convinced us that it’s our fault we don’t feel worthy, and has brainwashed us into normalizing toxic traits and behaviors in order to “earn that worthiness.”

I’ve made it my life’s work to help each of us get that freedom back. One faith-filled act of resistance at a time.