Now, I’m not saying that having goals, aspirations, and even a to-do list is destroying your self-worth and that we must get rid of it all. That would be ridiculous and a little extreme. I live by a good to-do list, otherwise, I would not remember whether I’m coming or going on a daily basis. The problem lies with our culture. Its historic roots in white supremacy created our modern-day human hierarchical culture that measures your worth based on your race, gender identity, class, ability, and participation in capitalism. This culture takes one look at your humanity and demonizes you for it.

It is okay to live in the tension of the both/and. It is okay to feel the heartache, the guilt, the desperation and recognize that ignoring your needs and your life is not what will save the lives of those who are fighting for theirs. Yes, it is so unfair that thousands of beautiful, innocent people can no longer live their lives as they were once able to, just as we are now. That truth also applies to many other similar circumstances that are unrelated to an unprecedented present-day massacre.