How to Get Clarity Around Your Calling
Okay, so you either feel excited to read this post, or you’re feeling like, “Oh, look. There’s that word ‘calling’ again. Yippee.,” in the most sarcastic tone in your head.
I used to be the latter. For various reasons.
As a child, I dealt with feelings of worthlessness and purposelessness. Due to varying degrees of trauma, I wrestled with feeling worthy of life at all, let alone a calling to fulfill. I struggled with knowing what it was I wanted to do with my life, what I was even good at or gifted in, and whether or not the things I wanted were the things that God wanted for me.
During high school and throughout all of college, I thought I was pretty clear on my career choice. I was going to be a news anchor. I was an excellent speaker, a pretty decent writer, and had a good grasp of storytelling. I finally found what I was good at, and boy did I just long to feel good at something. Feeling like I was good at something was validation for me to continue living. That, maybe there was a purpose for me after all.
In my senior year of college, I surrendered my life to Jesus. In the very next moment, like literally the very next moment, He told me not to pursue a career in journalism. I was literally months away from walking across the stage and receiving my Bachelor of Arts in journalism. I had fulfilled all of the requirements and I was working on my reel (a portfolio of work you present to a news station when applying for a job.) I believed that I had the next ten years of my life pretty much planned out.
Yet, I heard His voice as clear as day.
“I called you to be a wife and a mother first. You will meet your husband soon and have daughters. You cannot be the mother I called you to be with a career in journalism.”
Hearing that awakened my deep, deep desire for motherhood. Of course, it wasn’t top of mind when I was 22 years old. But, it had been there all along.
“Ah-ha! That’s my calling!” I thought to myself.
I went on to receive various revelations about my calling as I obeyed God in whatever He told me to do. At one point, He revealed to me that He would use me to speak to His people. He revealed that I would use my gifts in communications to do work that glorified Him. He revealed to me that I would be a joyous mother of children who also used her gifts to do various good works. As I received those revelations, I looked to the future eagerly as I imagined what it would look like to fulfill these callings.
Fast forward to marriage and having my children, and I had never felt further from my “callings.” While I was confident in my calling in marriage and as the mother of my children, everything else had fallen by the wayside. In fact, I had forgotten much of what God had told me. Yet again, I felt purposeless. I felt a void that I couldn't explain. I had been obedient to God, following exactly where He told me to go, enduring a 5-year long career that caused me more anxiety than I could have imagined, and now I was a mother who felt joyful in the role of mother but depressed in every other area of my life. I felt like God had forgotten about me, I felt guilty that I desired more because that didn’t feel godly, and I felt like my desires just didn’t matter anymore.
HAVE YOU EVER FELT THIS WAY?
Perhaps you’re a mother who feels like her other desires aren’t important anymore.
Perhaps you’re a woman who’s working at a job that feels so far out of alignment you could scream.
Perhaps there’s something on your heart that scares you so much it feels not only impossible but so selfish that you question whether or not it really is a calling.
Perhaps you just feel unclear, longing for some sort of clarity that will allow you to live a life doing good work that fulfills you and glorifies God.
YOUR CALLING IS EVER-EVOLVING
And, God doesn't want you to feel confused about it. He gave it to you, He wants to reveal it to you, and He wants you to live each day in pursuit of Him first, and the calling He has given you.
Why?
Because the works He calls you to glorifies Him and changes the life of His people. He delights in you doing the things you love, the things you feel drawn to, and the things that fulfill you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting clarity around your calling, permission to love your life and what you do with it, and anything else you desire. We have to stop convincing ourselves that the things we are called to are automatically not things we love because we won’t’ do the things we hate with as much excellence as the things we love and the work we do for the Lord must be done in excellence.
STEPS FOR CLARITY
1. Think about your story
God has been writing, and continues to write, a beautiful story of your life. It has been perfectly woven together, down the finest detail. Even the times you miss the mark, go left when He says right, and doubt when you hear Him. Even before you knew Him but he knew you. He’s been writing that beautiful story.
Your story is directly linked to your calling(s). Think intricately about it. Journal it out. Travel as far back as you can remember. Think about what you loved and didn’t love about different time periods of your life. God will begin to show you His purpose through the tiniest of details.
2. Think about your passion
If you’re anything like me, you may have thought that your passion is something to be ignored and denied. As believers, we are taught to deny the desires of the flesh. This is the way the true follower of Jesus lives. However, Christian culture tends to skew the gospel a lot, causing us to believe and behave in ways that God never intended.
God is the one who designed us perfectly. He is the creator of passion. He is the creator of dreams. He did not create us and give us passions for us to deny them. Quite the opposite. He wants us to live a life we love. A full, rich life that glorifies Him. He gets the glory when we live in passion and joy. He gets the glory when we bear fruit.
So, our passion matters. YOUR passion matters. Your calling is somewhere in there. Ask God to reveal to you what passions He has given to you and why He has given them to you. Then, act on them with boldness.
3. What are you good at?
As believers, we are also taught to practice humility However, our Christian subculture has turned that practice of humility into a denial of anything great that is within us.
Guess what? It’s okay to be good at something. It’s okay to be AMAZING at something. It’s okay to use the gifts that God has given you with confidence and excellence. Why would we want to do any less? We wouldn’t want the work we do for the Lord to be subpar, would we?
Own the things you are good at. God gave you those talents and gifts for a reason. You are called to walk in them. Think about what spiritual gifts you have and what natural gifts you have. When you combine those with your passions you will begin to uncover your calling.
4. What has God laid on your heart?
This is crucial. When we get still and lean into God’s voice, we will realize that He has been speaking all along. Chances are, He has laid something on your heart that has it your soul on fire. A drive, an idea, a passion, a pull. Whatever it is, act on that. You’ll probably realize just how much He placed on your heart just by answering the previous three questions. He has a reason you are here and He will not stop until you fulfill exactly what He has called you to do.
Listen to a deeper explanation of these steps in the How to Get Clarity Around Your Calling podcast episode at the links above or wherever you listen to your podcasts.